The Hard Part of Christian

Come to think of it, there are a few things I'm really good at. Getting along with people, for example. Writing, for another. Brewing a gallon of really good tea, sweetened with sugar (my wife calls it Missouri tea). I am not, apparently, good at being a Christian.

I hope you'll just go ahead and read the rest of this. It will be worth it. I promise. Because I'm writing this for all of you out there who agree with me that it's hard being a Christian sometimes - especially with all the slop and burp that may be going on in your little world right now - whether it's in your home, on the job, at school, in some relationship, or yes, even at church.

Face it. Being a Christian is hard. If you're a stand-up comedian, the only thing you're expected to do is crack people up while they eat their mozzarella sticks, and you sip your favorite drink. If you're a newspaper reporter, it's your job to report the facts (or make up the facts, whichever is easier at the moment). If you're a blogger, it's your job to just vent the way you feel at the moment and accept the comments people make about your venting, right or wrong, no judgments made, just accept it. If you're a Christian, though, you have to not just play the role but live the part. That's what makes it hard sometimes.

Yes, I know that some people are genuinely good at being a Christian, and some people fake their way through. I know that some people radiate joy and peace, and others have a make believe smile slapped across their face. But I also know that most people can tell the difference and are turned off by the latter.

I guess sometimes I feel like being a Christian is a lot like an inmate going before the parole board. Yes, I know that's going to be a very unpopular view, but allow me the luxury of being brutally honest. You may have robbed a bank at gunpoint one day in your life 15 years ago, but then you went through a jail house conversion, started a jail house ministry, started counseling other inmates with drug problems, and you became an exemplary inmate. But when you sit there before the parole board, the positive changes you made in your life are forgotten. All that matters is that you robbed a bank 15 years ago, and even though people say you're being judged on your more recent good deeds, the truth is, you can sense you're really being judged as a bank robber.

And so, welcome to faith. It can seem that way sometimes. You say the wrong thing, respond the wrong way, act before you think, judge before you discern, et cetera, et cetera. Fact is, you messed up and people called you to the carpet about it. But then, after working on yourself and more importantly allowing the Lord to re-shape your heart, you truly feel that you are still being judged according to the past mess ups in life.

I'd say it's frustrating for a whole lot of people out there. People believe whatever they want to believe, and no amount of pleading or whining will change their minds. Actually, that usually makes it worse.

Maybe we should all have some honest reflection once in a while and just simply say, I am not Christian enough. Mature enough. Calm enough. Whatever enough.

I have come to believe that when all the "enoughs" of our life are said and done we can all be incredibly thankful to have a God who forgives and moves on, who doesn't hold our screw-ups and our mess-ups over our heads and use them to judge us later. We are white as snow and He knows sincerity when He sees it. We mess up. And He teaches us, if we are open we learn and grow, and we move forward.

No parole board. No judge or jury. Just forgiveness with a hope and a future. We move forward, we are never rejected, we are never turned away. Our God deals with us directly. He doesn't string us along only to let us down in the end.

I think that God is a whole lot cooler than Christians. Which is basically why I keep trying to follow Him - despite the mess-ups and flubs in my life (and yes, you have them, too). It's why I keep trying to follow Him - and not His followers.

I'd say that we're all still trying to figure this life out. None of us has any hard, fast answers. The only answers we have lie in Him. We make mistakes, judge people, act immaturely at times (though I'm believing I have far less of this immaturish-ness than I used to have). I do it, you do it.

But our God never does. One person in this entire universe and beyond never screws up, never messes up, never flubs up - and that's why I get up every morning, take a deep breath, say a thankful prayer to my Creator and my Father, and give it another shot. Nobody else in this world is really worth the effort.

So take my word for it -being a Christian is hard, but it's always, absolutely, and unequivocally worth every day giving it another shot. Do it, for His name's sake - and for your own sake, too. It's worth it. Every bit.